Can you imagine such a thing



This is simply some of the funniest I have read in a long time.
And remember kids, it's from real life.

Imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many
Chicago folks DID hear this on the WBAM FM morning show in Chicago. The DJs
play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is called Mate Match
The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are married or seriously
involved with someone. If the contestant answers "yes", he or she is then
asked 3 random yet highly personal questions. The person is also asked
to divulge the name of their partner (with phone number) for verification.
If their partner answers those same three questions correctly, they both win the prize.
One particular game, however, several months ago made the City of Big
Shoulders drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the funniest
thing I've heard yet. Anyway, here's how it all went down:

DJ: "Hey! This is Edgar on WBAM. Have you
ever heard of 'MateMatch'?"

Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have."

DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving
away a trip to Orlando, Florida if you win. What is your name? First
only please."

Contestant: "Brian."

DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"

Brian: "Yes."

DJ: "Yes? Does that mean you're married or
you're what?"

Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am
married."

DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's
name? First only please."

Brian: "Sarah."

DJ: "Is Sarah at work, Brian?"

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at
work?"

Brian: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."

DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the
last time you had sex?"

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

DJ: "Brian! Stay with me here!"

Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."

DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"

Brian: "About 10 minutes."

DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh?
No one would ever have said that if a trip wasn't at stake."

Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be
nice."

DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you
have sex at 8 o'clock this morning?"

Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I,
well..."

DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it
at?"

Brian: "Not that it was all that great,
but her mom is staying with us for a couple of weeks..."

DJ: "Uh huh..."

Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in
the shower at the time."

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

Brian: "On the kitchen table."

DJ: "Not that great?? That is more
adventure than the previous hundred times I've done it. Okay folks, I
will put Brian on hold, get this
wife's work number and call her up. You
listen to this."

3 minutes of commercials follow.

DJ: "Okay audience, let's call Sarah,
shall we?"

(touch tones.....ringing....)

Clerk: "Kinkos."

DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there
somewhere?"

Clerk: "This is she."

DJ: "Sarah, this is Edgar with WBAM. We
are live on the air right now and I've been talking with Brian for a
couple of hours now."

Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"


DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line
with us. Brian knows not to give any answers away or you'll lose.
Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'MateMatch'?"

Sarah: "No."

DJ: "Good!"

Brian: (laughing)

Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell
are you up to?"

Brian (laughing) "Just answer his
questions honestly, okay? Be completely honest."

DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure.. Now, I will
ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If your answers match Brian's answers, then
the both of you will be off to Orlando, Florida for 5 days on us.
Disney World. Sea World. Tickets to the Magic's game. The whole deal.
Get it Sarah?"

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex,
Sarah?"

Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning
before Brian went to work."

DJ: "What time?"

Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."

DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long
did it last?"

Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."

DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure
she is trying to protect his manhood. We've got one last question,
Sarah. You are one question away from a trip to Florida.
Are you ready?"

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

DJ: "Where did you have it?"

Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell
them that, did you?"

Brian: "Just tell him, honey."

DJ: "What is bothering you so much,
Sarah?"

Sarah: "Well, it's just that my mom is
vacationing with us and..."

DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have
it?

Sarah: "In the ass....."

After a long pause, the DJ said, "Folks,
we need to take a station break"

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